I’ve decided to use this blog title to explain what I feel on this very day. I honestly had a bad day. Literally the worse-case scenario I’m pretty sure no one has stepped foot in. Imagine, yesterday was my mother’s birthday and she expected it to be a peaceful day for her, but then one of my band mates threw a verbal fit at her for the fight that we had. She didn’t need to be a part of it, and besides he owes me a HELL lot of money for the production of the music we’re going to do together. 

Secondly, I had a conversation with a friend who wanted to involve me in a newsletter. She asked for my new number, and by that time I texted her pretending to flirt with her. It was a joke and I thought she already knew it was me, but she thought it was somebody else and got upset thinking that the random person texting her was an asshole trying to hit on her. When I said it was me, instead of laughing she threw a tantrum. I’ve been dealing with not only one, but TWO people throwing fits at me.

Third, I’ve been having a hard time adjusting to my new country. I was involved in a job in the European embassy where I had to take care of kids, but then it turned out that the job I had was a total scam. I was also conned and have been ripped off financially by a lot of people who I need to work with, while they need the money to support them. In terms of my music, it’s also hard to find a community where I’m actually being supported and where I can maintain that excitement and life-giving glow. It seems like everybody here is very pessimistic about people doing music in the future and having so much passion for it.

The great thing is, I got accepted at a school in Brisbane. I’m starting next year, and so this year I’m going to be learning Indonesian dances, doing more projects with sincere people, and actually trying to be involved in more communities who are willing to accept me as who I am and that I can help to give love in return. It’s hard because I often feel that people are looking down upon me or not giving me enough room to be creative. Being creative and insightful is not a turn-on in Indonesia.

I love writing, I love playing music, and I really love to share my notions with other people and learn new things. Somebody please help me! GET ME OUT OF HERE!

“The world can be a very big place

So be yourself don’t get out of place…”

  On Wednesday April the 24th 2013, The Kooks performed live at the Road to Big Sound Festival amongst thousands of fans; they were in the last queue to perform that night. The self-described “pop” band of four members was formed in Brighton, East Sussex (UK) in 2004 with Luke Pritchard as the starring lead singer. Their follow-up album Konk was released in 2008 and sold up to 65,000 copies worldwide in the first week. 

Unlike Air Supply who has performed in Indonesia more than ten times, this is actually the first time The Kooks has ever stepped foot in this country of 13,000 islands. Although their band name may not be familiar amongst the mainstream industry, The Kooks has a Facebook page with approximately 2 million likes ranging from adults with sophisticated taste in alternative music to pre-teens who are interested in their mix between catchy and romantic style.

They opened up with one of their originals Ooh La, which got the crowds excited almost immediately and they eventually sang along with the band. The Kooks has a lively stage presence that keeps the audience on their feet. The introductory performance was accompanied by pale-blue floodlights, alternating with bright red. During the 60-minute live gig, Luke Pritchard sang while tap dancing. This type of gesture does not only bring character to the music itself, but also accentuates the beat.

The blocking primarily gives focus to the lead singer, guitarist and bassist. This allows the audience to pay attention to the rest of the band members so each of them can get their own shining moments. As they sing one song after another, the lighting varies from time to time in order to give each song different ambience. It is only after the long interval that they finally performed Junk of The Heart. This was the most anticipated song as the 2011 single has triggered approximately 4.6 million viewers on YouTube.  Unlike a lot of concerts that involve loud music, the acoustic guitar that was frequently used for the songs make the live performance more comforting to listen to.

This is what Astrid, a 16 year-old schoolgirl from Bintaro has to say about their performance:

“I had a great time watching their concert. They were fun, entertaining and not only that their performance was good, but their ability to communicate with the audiences is superb! Their melody is relaxing and it fits with the dynamics of young people. It was worth my time and money and I’m glad to have the opportunity to see them live after a very long wait…” 

After the concert, I had gotten the chance to meet with them backstage and asked them a few questions regarding their visit to Indonesia. Unfortunately, they did not have much time in their hands. I’m glad that I could at least talk to Luke Pritchard and asked about his insights into Jakarta.

As they were supposed to be performing at 7.00PM, the band appeared one hour late. Concerned about their wellbeing and the continuously heavy traffic in Jakarta, I asked about whether or not the trip made them feel tired. Apparently, Luke said that he and the band had been flying a lot from everywhere so it seemed that they did not notice the schedule change or the side effects of jetlag. 

What motivated them to come to Jakarta in the first place was that their followers on Twitter demanding them to do so. Pritchard said that they had wanted to come there for a long time, but did not have the chance to do so until then. Luke agreed that it was a great opportunity for him and the band to travel along and finally arrive to this country of 240 million people. Apparently the handful amount of population in a cosmopolitan area attracts more bands to come because of its massive network of fan-base.

Their best impression of Jakarta is that he finds the people amazingly friendly. The jacket that he brought on stage was given by an Indonesian band, as it was produced locally. When live at the gig, he mentioned about it as well and presented it with such a positive energy that it caused the fans to cheer and feel that the hospitable nature of our nation is being recognized.  

At the end, The Kooks wanted to convey a message to Indonesian youth: “Indonesia, we will come back! Thank you supporting us…”  

- A man who is able to maintain a great friendship or platonic romance, but is less desiring of deeper love nor sex.

These types of guys are easier to get by as friends but you would not feel satisfied when it comes to fulfilling ‘intimacy’

- A man who may not want to be your friend, but he is capable of giving love very quickly. He shelters you for protection and nourishment, but then selfish when it comes to sex and is under a watch-out for bad experience.

He seems lovey-dovey and attached to you more than you think he is, but is messy and aggressive when it comes to sex and only wants it done his way even if it makes you bleed to death.

- A man who is a really great friend, and is amazing at sex but cannot offer deeper love.

Now this one is awesome, but you cannot settle for something more than that since he prefers to only be your ‘one-night stand’ prince charming..

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The first guy offers a FRIENDSHIP. The second guy offers LOVE, while the third guy offers SEX.

The trick is, how to find a guy who actually has the three of them at once? 

Yes, I am using this as the title of my journal entry because the song reflects on how I feel. I do not think it is necessary for me to constantly put Indie songs as the title to my posts, what is indie anyway? As long as you come clean with what you feel and the songs help you get there, then that’s what you call the track of the day.

“I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh everyday of my life. My heart can’t possibly break when it wasn’t even whole to start with..” 

You read that particular statement? Yes that’s what I want to talk about today..

After moving around 5 times in my life, I realize how different it is the lifestyle of people in Indonesia as opposed to those living in Australia. Athough there are 720 languages spoken throughout the nation with 300 different ethnic tribes, Indonesia remains a homogenous society as most people’s lives are revolved around the religion they believe in and following the customs and standard of what the people do in the area. Whereas in Australia, there are immigrants coming from over a hundred countries; the norms and values vary according to their upbringing and cultural background of each individual. It’s much easier to know what to expect in a group of Indonesian communities, whereas it’s much harder to understand what most people believe in Australian communities as it always depends on each and every person you talk to.

These things play a big impact on an individual’s outlook in life - with one being extremely dependent on their surroundings, and another being too self-centred in their own lives. Most people I come across in Indonesia do not get to analyze their own feelings or stay genuine to themselves because when they have problems with people, they pay more attention to the perspective of other people and what they can do to deal with the situation. Whereas most people I come accross in Australia are more genuine, and instead of taking time to learn what the other person needs o wants they are more able to be insightful with themselves and are assertive enough to express it. The worse extreme of the two is when one loses their sense of individuality, and the other being too caught up in their own personal dilemmas and cannot pay attention to those in need. So although each country provides amazing benefits, I find it equally difficult to adjust to both.

The funny thing is, most people do not realize that their complete opposite behaviours bring the same impact to an individual’s outlook in life. Meaning that no matter how much one conforms to another - or one conforms to himself, they are still holding a happy facade when dealing with society. The way most Indonesian teenagers stay out of trouble is by finally conforming to their parent’s wants and needs; studying at a University with the major their parents have selected for them, thoroughly practising the religion they grew up with, getting married at the expected age of twenty-five and having the max. amount of two children as recommended by the local GP’s in the nation. Again, they have to understand WHY their parents want these things for them or why it’s not okay to get married at 40. So it does not have to do with their wants and needs in this scenario. When they approach people, they give just the same advices and do not really help teenagers find their own path. 

Whereas most people in Australia enjoy so much freedom, to the point where they sometimes lose track of their own boundaries. For example, growing up in a small town and being raised as a Born-again Christian in a Southern community. Then finally going off your own individual path, and move to a more cosmopolitan community like Melbourne. You decide to embark on your own journey to what you want in life, with your parents saying you’re 18 years old and on your own (financially and emotionally). Then you finally realize that there’s no such thing as ‘true love’ in the 21st Century and go off sleeping with lots of people and feel just as empty. Though no one tells you what to do and you’re very happy to have good income and a nice house by the coast, you end up getting so sombre feeling the urge to get out of where you are right now. Sometimes you don’t realize you could be very caught up in yourself, to the point where it’s difficult to help other people or talk about problems except your own.

The two people in the scenario are not happy, although they seem to hold a facade that they are either happy with their community or their own lifestyle. That’s the similarity, given the impact of their upbringing and family life. The point of the entry today is to analyse that whether one person comes from a homogenous or heterogeneous society, there are always constraints on what you can express or even do to help others. I think the point is for me to realize that it’s not about whether or not I should be the same like other people, it’s about the strategies I can use to approach them and put myself on a common ground. I am lucky I do not feel I belong to those stereotypes, and neither do some people. I guess I just have to find people, regardless of their community, who are willing to stay true to themselves and give to others at the same time.

Sorry for my crap article. I need to go to bed. Ciao!

- Ubud is a nice town to find wood-carvings, art galleries and a mini winery to keep yourself cool during the dry summer air. However, meeting a bunch of women and little children selling home-made postcards and beg you to buy them for urgent reasons (ie: schooling, housing, food) can be a little scary at most times. I saw them circling around me, at least five people, using all these random reasons and unable to stop chasing after me for over 10 minutes. It’s hard because I take pity on these people, who are amazing in doing their artwork but have little of sources to support themselves. After that experience, my Swedish ex (who was travelling with me) and I decided to do a cover of The Cranberries “Zombie”, because that word represented our feeling of empathy for their wellbeing.

- Being asked to perform with my Ukulele during my entrance to Australia. An Indian passport checker saw my student visa but was not convinced that it was an original copy. He asked me to sing a song while entering the border, as I sung “Happy Birthday”. Then, I pretty much became the centre of attention amongst the other passengers (including a Japanese little girl who came to m and said she really liked my voice) Awww, such a sweet experience indeed! 

- Getting confronted by an Israeli (who spoke in a French accent) to buy his “dead sea mineral” skin cream while I was in Civic. For some reason, he really liked my then-boyfriend and kept smearing the palm of his hands with a cream. He said “promize me zou vont scream! it’s ahh-may-zing!” whatever that means, got stuck in my head.

- Took an MRT in Singapore and came accross two women, who happened to be from The Phillipines and travelling around Marina Bay. We took several pics of the scenery, and they introduced me to more and more women. We had dinner together, they paid for my soup and coffee as we discussed about some skin care business project or whatever they’re doing. Again, to do with skin care. Do people get obsessed with my complexion or something? Geez.

- As I walked around Bangkok, my friends left me for a cigarette session. They ditched me as I accidentally stumbled upon a bearded drunkard with his last bottle of “Singha” (a Thai beer) he literally almost groped me and sounded like Gollum, a character in “The Hobbit”. It was like “I wanna eat you”… His hir was all white, his clothes were mostly ripped and I used my ninja fists to keep away from him.. 

- Transited to Malaysia, for a one-way trip from Jakarta to Melbourne. I met someone over there, we had so many things in common, he was a musician and after 24 hours of the long transit, we came back as a couple holding hands and shared our  kisses already. His mother picked us up for a lunch session at Healthy Habits, and she already said “I’ll be your mother..” Damn that was too soon!  

- Some monkey in Uluwatu, Bali stole my ex-boyfriend’s dad’s glasses. He decided to wear them, I tried to steal it off of him as he scratched my hand ‘til it started to bleed. Until we decided to give him a 100thou rupiah bill, he decided to let it go. Goddamn smart monkey..

loevly:

cu-rrents:

cu-rrents: and what does the dreamer do ?

The dreamer snaps back to reality only to find that he will never sail at all because he is, indeed, a dolphin.

 - Watched MEW in Java Rockingland Festival in 2009. I captured the final “Comforting Sounds” shot as all the audiences put their hands up in the air, feeling the ambience and yellow lights. The photo was being used as the main theme of the gig, and had several likes. (Pic coming soon)

- Big Day Out 2012, Auckland. It was the last BDO in New Zealand’s history, probably one of the most captivating season of the year. Some random guy gave me a free ticket as I complained about the price raise. Ticketmaster said it was $59.99NZD, but the ticket seller on the spot said it was $160.00NZD! I was fucked, man. So I’m glad I got the free ticket after all. My Chemical Romance did well in terms of the live sound quality, but the most emotionally uplifting performances were by Kasabian and Noel Ghallager and The High Flying Birds!

- Groovin The Moo 2012, Canberra. The way they designed the map and everything had such a primitive style to it, which really suites the area they chose to do it in! University of Canberra’s field is really wide, steep and has a lot of trees in it. Once it rains, it also gets fucking muddy. The natural resources are awesome, and so was Kaiser Chiefs and Mutemath! I had gotten to meet them in person and received some autographs too. Good stuff.

fuckyeahtattoos:

A quote by Albert Camus from The Stranger.

Done at Absolute Ink in Murfreesboro, TN!

Acting without expression… is boring”

And YES.. Who you’re looking at over there is me :)

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Photographed by: Hawker College

Date and Location: May 31st 2012, Murranji Theatre, Capital Territory, Australia

jonasbjerre:

APPARATJIK at THE NATIONAL GALLERY OF DENMARK

Apparatjik will bring their light space modulator to Statens Museum For Kunst / The National Gallery Of Denmark in Copenhagen, on May 3rd 2013!

More info here:

http://www.smk.dk/besoeg-museet/nyheder/artikel/apparatjik-paa-smk/

Buy tickets here: 

https://www.billetlugen.dk/koeb/billetter/?token=AvO4IsSbEcFFMy5sNDSQ%2fvCznveQKeaR4ASCeNz0u1nx37cMzfg13SkaVkKEK0PgHV64I1VbA53v1ZJdbkjFnn0HC%2fqCNN6AAnCrEocuiSjmacn1u3ZeMEn2fpLU79FMMf1vMDw%2ftCLRNsY%2fKBF0q9EGBA%2fpcGPF78WM3fXggyNrg81PSWSbdA%3d%3d

Mew is my favourite band since the age of 11, their first song I listened to on MTV was “The Zookeeper’s Boy” in April 2006. For some reason, it had triggered me to write more songs than I ever did as their music had nurtured the creative side of me. Now, the lead singer Jonas Bjerre (who has a remarkably high and dreamy voice) continues to embark on his musical journey by forming another band called “Apparatjik” with other players from Coldplay and A-ha, again two other bands that have greatly played part in my musical influences.

I won’t be able to come to their performance in Denmark unfortunately. I live all the way in Asia, and if they could come over to Indonesia then my burden would be decreased by 90%

I can’t wait to cover “Symmetry” with my friend who is also a singer. It will come on YouTube, and I’m also gonna do Apparatjik covers if Jonas is ok with it. Can I have your permission? Thanks

1. Going to a geothermal walk in Bay of Islands, New Zealand, and meeting a number of Maori locals who told their story about how they formed as a clan in the first place. As theatre lovers, they are skilled in acting and were trained to understand more about their native culture. They were also taught to cook the way the native New Zealanders do, which is to place the raw meat in a traditional wooden oven where you put a bag of coals underneath to set up the fire. The temple is located not so far from the town itself, which is approximately 20-30 minutes drive. The shrine was created next to the river where a European colonist found for the first time. Since the 19th century, it has always been the place where history repeats itself as the Maori clans continue to explain to the newcomers how New Zealand is formed.

2. The “ActewAGL” Royal Show, held in Canberra around February 2012 last year. They brought in 44 circus animals, including Llamas and giraffes. I was there with my then-boyfriend, exploring the insanity of the dynamics. Some of the bulls were even used to compete with one another, and there were also people getting milk out of cows literally with their bare hands. What I hated about the place was that there were sexy circus entertainers that my ex was interested to watch, what I really loved was when we had gotten the chance to watch a dog race and how the little pup wins over the bigger dogs who could run faster.

3. In Darling Harbour, Sydney, when I had the chance to watch street buskers and entertainers bace themselves as they create their mini spectacular shows. Apart from the beautiful view including the seagulls and yacht, there was a clown who put a stick in his mouth and it came out as fire in the end. I went there with a number of friends, as some fireworks were also played. Although it was nearly 11PM, the city did not fail to entice the pedestrians and tourists.

4. I was dared to walk over the mini waterfall in Tanah Lot, Bali, as I was told to drink the so-called “Holy Water”. They said that the water is clean, and good luck may occur the more I drink it. When I filtered a large amount of water into the palm of my hands, suddenly the colors had transformed into rainbow.. it smelled really nice and I felt a glimpse of serenity..

5. Going to the Buddhist temple in Saraburi, Thailand. I went on a 5-day retreat all by myself, and I’m amazed to see the giant statue of sleeping buddha and the really steep valleys they have over there. I sat by the lake for a meditation session as the rain fell down. I decided to sit there and get myself wet. Fortunately I did not catch a cold as I was somewhere in the countryside. There were approximately 50-100 monks and nuns hosting the venue, and I was amazed at how they could sleep as late as 1AM and wake up at dawn with very little (vegan) food to survive and hang onto throughout their far longer stay than the visitors.

6. The great wall of China was the best and the most daring place I have ever visited. Honestly, it was daunting for a girl like myself who is afraid of heights, and the weather over there was around -10 Celcius. With the help of a sausage sizzle and an utterly sarcastic brother who is not afraid of anything, I tried to climb as high as I could get until I reached a step nearby the mountains where the staircase was fragile and scraggly. I probably was around 5,000 - 10,000 feet above the ground! (I know some people aim higher than that, but apparently I was too scared)

I need to travel more… I do not think my experiences are so perfect enough to share the rest of the world.

In Sydney:

- Randomly sung at a restaurant, and then approached by 3 students from Australian Institute of Music. They liked the cover of Green Day that I had just done live by singing to the song that was played on the radio.

- Went to Chinatown and tasted pig blood jelly for the first time. The name itself sounds disgusting, but believe me it tastes like brown tofu! It is really THAT good..

- Stayed at a $60/night hostel which consists of British staff members. It’s not the British part that makes the highlight, it is the fact that all of them were women, all of them looked about the same age, with similar facial features and heights, were all blondes, and were of the same nationality. Both the day and night managers are so, and as to the receptionist and hostel assistant! I asked if they were quadruplets, they said that they weren’t even related!

- Was really curious to open a vintage-looking door around a shopping centre, and when I got in, I stumbled upon a very beautiful church. It was a big one, had stained-glass window artwork, a really big fountain, and very well-carved statues. I’m not a religious person myself, but it was surprising because it looked like a closed-down store on the outside. Had I decided not to open that door, it would have been assumed to be a shop that is either bangkrupt or closed for the day. I took pictures of how it looked like, and my mom asked if we could stay for an hour because well, she’s the one who is more into the religion than me, but praying with the Christians was a great experience.

- I randomly met buskers who were married to one another. They were singing some really nice 60’s songs, like one of Scott Walker’s and I actually participated with them until sunset. It was in Central tunnel, and then they gave me their name cards and we’re still in contact until now.

- Paddy’s market sold cute married koala dolls for $1.50 each, and I bought 6 of them and gave them to my friends. The bigger dolls were $1.70. I had a souvenir shopping spree, and also bought myself a hoodie for $10!

- At the end of that night, I saw a custom-made lambourghini that was worth $200,000 - $300,000! The size itself was like a sausage dog, and had a plate name that said “Hendra”, which is an Indonesian name. That guy must be like this rich businessman and  got his Permanent Residence in Australia or something, otherwise he wouldn’t have bought the car!

That’s what friends are for, when you have more, it gets merrier :)

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Photographed by: Hawker College

Location: Murranji Theatre, Australia
 

“How many shots of bees did you just have?”

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Photographed by: Marya Budianta

Location: Huka Honey Hive, New Zealand.

Check out my art gallery! 

SLOGAN: Conserve energy and create things out of the ordinary!